Going out of my mind

Believe it or not, my brain jumped out of my head today. It came out of my nose and climbed up on it so that I'd have to strain my eyes to look at it. Double vision made me see two brains instead of one.

"Why are you so small?" I asked. "I always thought you were bigger."

"That's why you say that you thought I was bigger," it replied. "You never really saw me you know."

I nodded and picked up my brain from my nose. It dangled from the tips of my fingers, dripping brain juice. Slimy from the fluids it was floating in in my noggin. I put it in my mouth. It struggled. Still, I persisted. I didn't want my brain going through my nose again so the mouth was the next best thing.

The task proved harder than I expected. My brain jostled itself inside my mouth. I tried to suck it up and then realized that that was impossible. Stupid me. You can only suck things down. Then again, my stupidity could be blamed on my lack of a brain in those moments.

I pulled my brain out of my mouth and placed it in my left ear instead. I pushed it in. It resisted but I won the battle in the end. I heard my brain settle into the fluids it landed on. I shook my head and heard it sigh a sigh of relief. Thank God. I let out a sigh as well.

So much for going out of my mind.

- June 30, 2008

from a previous blog on

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